I shrunk, or the phone grew

Many of you have been asking (or one of you, you know who you are) what it's like to sit under a giant sun and get zapped. I now have a bit of experience -- 4 rounds to be precise. From the observation table on which I lie from day to day, it is like sitting under a telephone handset -- except either I have shrunk, or it has grown. The zapper looks like a traditional mouth piece on an old handset from an old rotary phone if you can remember those. Except when I place a call it's just those radiation guys in the other room and they get upset if I ask for the operator. Anyway, the handset clicks and buzzes a lot, and rotates and clicks and buzzes some more. That's how I know it's working. Thus far no negative effects from that. Just the usual annoying symptoms I've always had. Last night I think I slept a little better cause of some good pain meds. Next I'm thinking accupuncture. Anyone have any good / bad / indifferent experience with it?

snow

It's still snowing. The one great thing about being sick is I can enjoy the snow from the inside and now feel so guilty about not being outside shoveling it or playing in it with the relatives. Unfortunately I have to go out in it at least once a day to get to the dreaded radiation which started yesterday. It's not a comfortable feeling sitting under one of those machines. It's rather creapy knowing that the thing they're using to "cure" me can also cause the same disease I'm trying to get rid of. For now I have to trust the recommendation of my doctors. Not exceeding in trust these days, I continue to look to Psalm 118 for comfort and assurance:

I shall not die but live before Him,
And all His mighty works declare,
That all may joyfully adore Him
Who in His lovingkindness share.
In truth, the Lord has surely chastened,
But not to death delivered me;
In His paternal love He hastened
To mitigate my misery.
(Psalm 118, The Psalter)

feeling better, obliged to write a new post

I'm feeling better after receiving much relieve from an emergency abdominal surgery. Whereas before I couldn't stay seated for more then 15 mins, now I can sit for hours without discomfort. Sitting still is the key to my gaining weight, as I'll need it for the coming months of chemo, etc. So starting now I'll be sitting still for the next three months. Here I go, putting on the pounds!! My doc tells me it will make my treatments go better. Next week I start treatments, having been delayed by about a week for this surgery. I can't start soon enough for my liking.

At least it isn't Swine Flu

When I went to see my doctor a few weeks ago, you could say I was rather relieved to find that I didn't have swine flu. That may have been the only good news of the day. After reveling in that for a few minutes, I was a little more concerned to find that indeed I have cancer. The doctor had suggested that that was the most likely case after an examination a few days earlier, but this visit to the doc confirmed the diagnosis. The one relief in this, as many people have said before me, is that I now know what the cause of all my symptoms is -- discomfort, fatigue, sickness, etc. The treatment is even less delightful. I may get into that later, but not now. I am not upset or angry about any of this. The one thing that I am cofident of is that God is in this and that all he does is good. I do not know how this will all work out, but I know that "God causes all things to work together for the good of those who love God" (Romans 8:28). This may not happen now, or even 20 years from now, but God's purpose in this trial is good.